Six Year Cancer Survivor

     I am celebrating my sixth year as a cancer survivor.  When I was given a "Cancer Free" diagnosis on December 27, 2004, I was ecstatic.  This thrill was short lived because five weeks later, we received my husband  Tom's diagnosis of terminal lung cancer.  

   

     My joy turned to feelings of fear, worry and stress.  Tom survived for fifteen months.  When he died I not only felt intense grief, but an overwhelming sense of guilt.  Why had I survived my cancer and he did not?  There is no answer to that question.  It has taken me over four years to finally let go of my guilt.

     I know that Tom would want me to live my life the best that I can.  I know he would want me to find some happiness, even in his absence.   Some days this is a difficult task, but I am working at making my life the best I can.  

     I embrace family and friends with a new sense of value.  I enjoy the beauty that nature has to offer and  have a renewed sense of the things I value.  I have done a lot of soul searching and I am dedicating myself to reaching out to others in a way that will not only benefit them, but myself as well.

    My hope is that by sharing my expereinces with others, not only with coping techniques, but also my reflections of my experiences, that they too will find happiness and joy along there journey through life.